Should I Go Back to College Now?
Question by : Should I go back to college now?
Lots of stuff has happened in my wee little life. Parents were drug heads, grew up with my maternal grandparents both passed away by the time I was 16, then lived with paternal grandmother till 18. My grandmother(mom’s mother) was diagnosed with a brain tumor and she was my best friend and always wanted me to strive for the best in all things and I did my best to help her through radiation treatments and brain surgeries and she is now gone. My mother all throughout my childhood was in and out of jail, my father too. They finally would get stable and tug on me to come and live with them which would mean I’d leave my grandparents behind. My mother is in prison now, and my father is a house “dad,” while he is with a wonderful, very accomplished woman he baby-sits and helps at the house. Anyhoo, I always participated in sports, and strived for exceptional grades in fact, I graduated second in my class. I had 15 hours of college credit and I went big and shipped off to UT Austin. I guess I was supposed to be the God-child of the family. Church events, sport events, community events, top of my class, going to UT gonna become an anesthesiologist and everything great! Well…I made it to UT…started off fine and was shaken. I had all A’s for the first month…B’s second month…and 3rd F’S! I went to office hours, studied with friends, went to tutors. 500 pages to be read(write two essays over and take a test by Friday) a week, massive homework in statistics every night with a mini-test every friday…constantly making presentations and preparing for that massive 20 page research paper in another class…and worrying about the ONLY 4 tests i had the in the other class. I was overwhelmed, scared, and alone? I would study for 100 hours(no exaggeration) at least 10 hrs a day for 10 days for one test that i made a 55 on. That happened on three occasions…so it was like a horrible nightmare i couldn’t comprehend the material no matter how hard I tried, was depressed, had anxiety attacks, lost 24 pounds, and went to the mental health center on campus but felt like I got the whole generic “how do you “FEEL” about that psychological treatment.” Nehoo, dropped out about a month before finals right after finding out i had failed 2 of my classes. (not to mention was fighting with my family because to THEM I WAS GOING TO GRADUATE WITH HONORS!).
-anyways, after all that..I really want to get back into school. I took the next semester off, went back in the fall of last year barely scraped a C out of one class and a D out of the other(easy classes). I guess I lost my motivation. I lazily didn’t get signed up for classes this spring…and am now working a part-time job. I had a really hard time with those classes last fall…I would get super anxious about easy tests and assignments and my UT college experience would come back and haunt me, get dreams about it and all. I mean is there still hope? After 4 F’s in classes at my previous university(all a’s from the community college I attended back home), and the C and D at this community college. Is there a way I can still attend finish it out and go to nursing school like I had intended all along? I feel like there’s no hope. And this time I want to go on MY wants and dreams not my parents and families. Sorry it’s so long…guess my original question sums it up should I still go back and even if I do will i make it far?
Best answer:
Answer by betterthanyou17
nope
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